


Take your Time

by oliverqsmoak



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Nymphadora Tonks - Fandom, Remadora - Fandom, Remus Lupin - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Remadora
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-02
Updated: 2015-10-02
Packaged: 2018-04-24 10:22:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4915858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oliverqsmoak/pseuds/oliverqsmoak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus wonders about Tonks in the rain.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take your Time

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written in ages and have never written Remadora fanfiction before. English isn't my native language, so I'm very sorry if I make any grammar- or spelling mistakes. Enjoy!

His mind was twisting. He could hear them whispering nearby, but was too distracted to pay attention

Here he sits, trying to remember the way she tastes like; strawberry with a little bit of chocolate. The way her eyes lit up every time she sees him. That crooked smile he loves so much.

 _She would wind up dead eventually,_ he thinks. _You did the right thing._ But his heart wouldn't believe that. Never did, never will.

It's been two months and he wonders if her hair has turned pink again. His favorite shade of the upcoming sun in the winter. Every time the sun came up, he had to think of her. Perhaps she was watching it, too. The sunset wasn't nearly as beautiful. Too red and not even close to the color of her hair.

He remembers their first time together. How careful he'd been. Like she was made of porcelain and he was afraid he'd break her. The way her lips felt; soft, longing. Her hands fit perfectly with his own, tracing every part of his body. He'd waited so long for this moment. She had, too. He didn't know it was possible to ache for someone so badly.

His mind had exploded that time. Couldn't fathom what was happening. Tonks had no idea what she was doing with him. Nor did he. Perhaps he was drunk on love, but too afraid to give in. It was like an addiction he didn't want to acknowledge. He wanted to breathe it in, hold onto it and never let go. At the same time he wanted to throw it away. She deserved better than him, deserved a future, someone young and whole. His body and past were scarred and he didn't want to give her the same faith.

But he couldn't forget the way she touched his scars; carefully, but needing at the same time. The way her fingers send shivers through his body. Her touch made his insides burn and he couldn't help but tremble. No one has ever done that before. Treated him like a real person, human.

She'd told him they'd made him who he was. She thought of him as a survivor, but he couldn't get the word _worthless_ out of his head. In the real world he was no one, a dark creature, someone to be afraid of. But this moment, this perfectly, blissfully moment wasn't real. In this moment he could draw constellations on her skin and kiss every freckle she owned. He could whisper loving words in her ears and act like the world around them didn't exist, because at that moment, it didn't. It was only them. She was the sun in his constellation and that was all he ever needed. She made his dull, dark days bright. She made him forget about his past for a while. She was his drug and he was too addicted to even think about letting go. He needed more every time he got a taste of her.

It became a routine. Tonks would kiss all of his scars. He'd asked her once why she did that. 'I want to show you that I love all of you,' she'd said. 'With or without scars.'

But it was all too brief, too surreal. She would hate him eventually, see the man he really was; dangerous, a monster. He would spare her the pain and leave. She would find someone else and live her life the way she should be; safe, happy and without him.

As the drizzle turns to rain and he sees the people around him, he can't help but think how different life could have been. He can't help but think about her. Because that's all he ever does. She's a part of him, just as he's a part of her. But he's too afraid to acknowledge that. If he does, it becomes real and real is dangerous.


End file.
